Let me take you back to Saturday just gone - Eurovision night! How on Earth did Norway win!? For those of you who didn't watch the show here's the performance, for those of you who did, a nasty reminder....
Yes, I know what you're thinking, I thought it too...
Why is Harry Potter playing a fiddle?
Why are the dancers dancing like frogs?
Who the hell are those scary girls in pink?
Put it this way, on my official score-card I gave Norway a measely 12 out of 30. 4 for song quality (it is quite catchy), 4 for performance (the dancing frogs are spritely) and 4 for Dance/Outfits (the scary girls in pink save the day here).
They were certainly no Ukraine! The woman re-mortgaged her bloody house to pay for her stage set. Did the little norwegian imp care enough to do that? nope, by the looks of things, he didnt even invest in a new stick/ bow thing!
As with many issues in life I turn to the comments on youtube for guidance..."the song sucks and this ugly guy should die" - perhaps a little harsh Fussgaengerzone!Musicloveroninternet says they "dont know anyone that does not like his songs", they've clearly not met me and jjgreek1 exclaimed "Freedom for Russia's Gays NOW", there's a time and a place and I feel this is the wrong forum.
It's officially been over a month since I updated my blog! But I'm back and with a good'un!
Tonight, is the night...The 54th Eurovision Song Contest goes live to the Nation! WOW!
There are 25 countries in the final, only one can win! This year they are trying to remove the risk of "political voting" by incorporating two elements of a vote. The public of each country will vote for their favourite country...I mean song...and then a panel of music experts will also vote for their favourite, the scores will be added together and this will be the countries vote. Basically it's not only up to the public to vote it's a 50/50 split between the un-trained ear and that of the music experts!
I wonder who the UK are using as our panel of Music Experts...perhaps The Cheeky Girls? They've been quiet for a while? Or Victoria Beckham? Rick Waller!? We've had such fine fine musical wonders! I wasn't asked granted...but Im going to give you my predictions...With risk of sounding like a Blue Peter presenter, you too can join along and vote for your favourites by visiting the official Eurovision Song Contest website: http://www.eurovision.tv .
Lithuania - Loving the political message "Stop the Violence" used in the video, how humanitarian, How Madonna! Real instruments should also gain him respect from the "real" musicians.
Israel - Awful song, Awful video.
France - A ballad? This is Eurovision!...enough said....next!
Sweden - Opera with a beat!? Genius! LOVING the outfits, loving the cheesy dancers...a good contender!
Croatia - A little too "Croatian" for me...however they earn points with an impressive video although they loose these points by presenting themselves as a duet when it's clearly the guy singing it all! The girl Andrea Šušnjara just seems to flounce around like a human flag.
Portugal - Vile.
Iceland - The official website say that Yohanna "started singing even before she could talk"(?!) hmmm...I'm willing to overlook this ridiculous comment because the song isn't too bad and she's mighty pretty and there is a key change (I love a key change)...will that be be enough though?
Greece - Great entry last year (Kalomoira - Secret Combination) will they come up with the goods again this year? HELL YES! Fantastic video, beautiful singer (bad dancer though), great song! Greece you've done us proud again!
Armenia - Weird but kinda Cool. Not liking the use of "normal" people as dancers, leave it to the proffesionals...catchy tune though!
Russia - The winners last year! hmmm obviously couldnt be arsed this year.
Azerbaijan - Loving the girl, Loving the Video, Loving the Dancers, the song is alright, my advice...lose the scary looking Tom-Jones-esque guy.
Bosnia & Herzegovina - Two countries input? Firstly is that fair? Evidence a problem shared is not always a problem halved. The song is ok, but these guys need to sack the stylist...everyone know eurovision is 40% outfit choice, 30% use of dancers and stage effects, 20% hotness of singer and 10% singing ability.
Moldova - "One autumn morning in a small village in the south of Moldova a young woman prayed to her god; she asked: “Give me, My God, a girl who would become a singer!"...HAHA!
Malta - oh God what to say! I don't want to seem a bitch, but when I watched this video my instant thought was "Michelle McManus" I could over look this if the song was good...it isnt.
Estonia - Great Fringe, crap song.
Denmark - Hot Singer but what's with the American twang to the voice? Very commercial pop song, dare I say it Ronan Keating stylee?...could do well, not eurotrash enough for my liking though.
Germany - Oh my! "Hey Miss Kiss, let us dance"? There's already one Ricky Martin in the world and that's too many in my opinion. Hmmm, the jury is out over this one.
Turkey - This is what Eurovision is all about! Beautiful girl, cheesy music and thrusting dance moves - one comment... I pray that she wears a better outfit on the night...a great contender for Greece.
Albania - AWFUL AWFUL video but fabulous song, shes only 17!
Norway - hate it, he's like the Norwegian version of Ray Quinn!
Ukraine - My favourite entry last year (see my 2008 year review) and this year is no different so far - another AMAZING entry. The video and song has a real Girls Aloud crossed with Britney vibe about it...I havent listened to all the countries yet - but so far...thisis one of my favourites!
Romania - I wasnt expecting a lot from the Romanias...but this is actually bloody good! This is getting hard, I think this is probably just as good as the Ukraines entry! I'm torn now! This has a real Britney vibe to the video, we all know I love a bit of Miss.Spears.
United Kingdom - Don't like her, Don't like the song. It's the Eurovision song contest, not battle of the musicals! I also can't get the performance out of my head when she won our country heats and basically sobbed and snotted down the mic...1 mocha out of 10.
Finland - Don't get the video nor do I like it...the song is pretty catchy though, bit chavvy perhaps? Will have to see how the live performance goes, if there is a mirror ball involved this could sway my decision.
Spain - last and pretty must least the Spanish entry...I dont like her haircut but the song is OK....not as good as some of the other countries though..."come on and take me, come on a shake me" - could be a great jingle for shake 'n' vac!?
So that's the lot...My money is on one of two countries *Drum roll please* Romania or the Ukraine. It's too hard to pick just one...they are equally as good...see for yourself!
Romania
Ukraine
I know I'll be watching with a bottle or two of bucks Fizz (predictable huh?)...queston is, will you? People of Britain...in the words of Graham Norton..."Your country needs you!"
